Things only a parent would say: Oh, it's just a used BandAid.

Today, I'll take it.

I think it's beautiful, in a weird way, that my wedding rings have left a callous on my hand.

The bright side of today: I got to see what the inside of an iPhone looks like.

My son asks: if we have silent letters, why don't we have invisible letters that we say but don't see?

Excellent question.

Boys could be locked in a completely empty room and still find something to throw.

OH in my car full of teenagers this morning: When someone texts you "Dude" the "where are you" is implied.

And yet I see one parked RIGHT THERE. Did that dude really think he would get away with it?

12 yo Son (frantic, wearing one shoe): Can you pleeeaaassseeee help me find my other shoe???

Me: Sure.
12yo Son: Okay.....it looks EXACTLY like this one.


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My mail was very uptight today. I think it needs to sit down with a nice glass of Cab.

When a line outside a barbershop includes a bald guy, you have to assume this is one pretty outstanding barbershop.

Ever since I found out eggshells were filled with calcium, baking has become so much less stressful.

Stepped on. Didn't slip. I OWN this day.

Will these 3-D printers FINALLY print me my jetpack?

Weird segue ends up just telling it like it is.