Foursquare would have made The Hangover a very short movie.

Two minutes into the appointment I started to wonder what exactly was going to happen here.

French drains. Sump pumps. Leveled yards. No flooding!! Now the roof is leaking. At least the money spent on swimming lessons is paying off.

There's bird poop on the snow blower. I think that trumps the groundhog seeing its shadow.

Here I sit with 5000 staples. And not one stapler.

The child who asks how babies are born right when it's time for him to go to bed is not curious. He's brilliant.

My ADD has gotten so bad, it's just AD now. Can't get to that second D.